I have always felt that I am not a person with fiery emotions. I have no rebellious youth, no unforgettable memories, and certainly no earth-shattering romance. People like me surely wouldn't fall in love with someone without hesitation, or so I thought. Perhaps I don't even know how to truly love.
But when a group of people get together, they always talk about the things they like—maybe anime, maybe music, but mostly idols. In that era when Naruto, Gintama, Avril Lavigne, and Mayday were everywhere, I, due to my personality, wouldn't deliberately try to understand what was currently popular. Even if I thought about checking it out, I would soon forget.
So, I didn't cover my notebooks with stickers of Wowkie Zhang, my room wasn't filled with posters of Song Joong-ki, and it was impossible for me to loudly proclaim on social media that Eric Tsang was my husband. Wait, it should be Leung Chiu-wai.
Therefore, whenever I encountered such topics, I would calmly say, "Me? I like Jay Chou." Liking Jay Chou is never wrong.
Actually, I don't even know if I truly like him. I can sing all his songs, but I never thought about starving myself for half a month just to attend his concert. I keep up with his recent news, but I won't get into arguments with people who hate on him. I just quietly pretend that I like him, just as I like that turbulent, uninhibited youth.
Pretending
I first saw Jay Chou on a poster for "Common Jasmine Orange" (七里香) on the wall of my brother's room, who is four years older than me. When he rubbed my face and said I had gained weight again, I saw the childish and rebellious Jay. Actually, I didn't know those words back then; I just thought he looked so cool. Then, seeing my expression, my brother said this was his new idol, and everyone in his class liked him. After going on and on about Jay, he played a cassette tape for me. From that old, worn-out Goody (好记星) repeater came the clearest sound of that summer.
Unfortunately, in the end, I only remembered those two lines:
The sparrows outside the window are chattering on the telephone poles. You said this line feels just like summer.
And after these two lines accompanied me through the summer break of sixth grade and helped me proudly become a junior high student, I decided that I would follow my brother and like Jay Chou too.
Back then, everyone liked him. The school broadcasting station would play Jay's songs during the basketball games after school. While I was cheering hard for my brother on the sidelines, I would hum along in my mind, just like most people did. Whenever my brother got on the court, there would always be more people. Most were his classmates from the third year of junior high, but there were also many junior girls, and even senior girls from the high school department. Why would these little girls like someone who loves to show off so much? I would occasionally think this after watching him make a cool fadeaway jump shot and then look at the audience with a self-satisfied smile.
But these little girls just happened to love that style, so my brother's girlfriends changed constantly. However, he never mentioned his stories with his girlfriends to me. When I curiously asked, he would only say he didn't like them at all, with his usual cocky expression. I would usually scoff and say nothing. But in fact, I knew he just couldn't bear to reject them and hoped to have a pretty girlfriend. The latter was definitely more likely. And I also knew he liked the study committee member of his class. Because every page of his draft notebook had "Dongzhi" written on it.
Born on the Winter Solstice (Dongzhi), she was named after it. Besides her studies, Dongzhi was also an amazing dancer. She spoke gently and was a model of a lady in everything she did. "Unlike you, you're practically a tomboy." It's a pity Dongzhi didn't like Jay Chou. But Jay is so great, she would definitely grow to like him.
Sometimes I would get annoyed by his constant talking, so I would tell him, "If you like her, just confess. What's the point of whining to me here?" Then he would seriously look at me with his usual cocky expression and say, "You little brat with no dating experience, there are some things you don't understand."
Yes, as a freshman in high school, I didn't understand the feelings of a struggling senior high student like him pining for a top student. But watching his feigned sadness, I couldn't help but comfort him. I said, "You're so outstanding, maybe she likes you too but is too shy to say it." Then I would encourage him to confess.
Finally, he decided to confess at the graduation dinner, using Jay's "Starry Mood" (星晴). He even sang it to me many times. I said, "It's so cheesy, surely no one would like that. And she doesn't even like Jay." My brother glanced at me and said nothing.
I don't know the process, but the ending was obvious. When I received the text and ran to the KTV, he was singing "Starry Mood" alone with a hoarse voice. Singing it over and over again. I sat beside him, hugging my schoolbag and crying. He suddenly turned his head and asked me, "Silly, why are you crying?" I looked at his red, swollen eyes and said, "It's okay. Actually, she wasn't right for you at all. Didn't you like summer? It's okay, it's okay." He just looked at me like that. Tears kept falling, drop by drop.
"You still have me."
I said to him anxiously. He finally couldn't hold back and started sobbing. Leaning on my shoulder, he said, "I don't even have you anymore." I looked at him, acting like a child, and said, "It's okay, I'll sing for you."
The sparrows outside the window are chattering on the telephone poles. You said this line feels just like summer.
"That sounded terrible. I'm banning you from singing Jay's songs for a month."
Later, he really didn't have me, and I didn't have him either. There would no longer be that basketball player who loved to show off in school. Summer had passed, too.
On the day of the Winter Solstice, I received a call from him in Harbin. I heard him trembling as he said to me, "Summer is still the best. Winter is hell." I laughed and asked him, "Didn't you like Dongzhi the most?" He also laughed and said, "What Dongzhi? She's so short-sighted. There are plenty of pretty girls in college. If you hadn't mentioned her, I would have forgotten her long ago."
Actually, you just couldn't bear to reject them, right?
We were both quiet for a while, then he said, "Sing for me, let's see if you've improved while I was away."
"Tch."
Want to return to the past, Try to let the story continue. At least it wouldn't let you leave me.
Later, my brother found a girlfriend he could finally bring home—pretty, gentle, and soft-spoken, practically another Dongzhi. But the difference was, she liked summer and Jay Chou. After fighting through their college years, they finally decided to get married.
That day, I wore a cheongsam in the same style as Jay's, put on heavy makeup I wouldn't normally even think of wearing, and served as my brother's bridesmaid. During the event, I sang a song I had practiced for a long time, prepared for him.
You turn to the north, your profile is still so beautiful.
Later, I asked my sister-in-law why she fell for someone like my brother. She smiled and said, "Probably because I like boys who like Jay Chou, and your brother just happened to like girls who like Jay Chou."
Oh, I see. I also like boys who like Jay Chou.
So, perhaps, I do like Jay Chou. Whether it was learning to sing so I could sing to him, or getting to know him so I wouldn't be bored during conversations. By the time I didn't have him anymore, my youth was filled with Jay Chou.
So, I like Jay Chou.
Of course, I won't say any of the things above. I'll just smile faintly and say, "Me? I like Jay Chou." I've liked him for a long, long, long time.
Cowboys and Red Indians are dueling back-to-back in town, A gray wolf asks me who the sharpshooter is. The wizard chants a curse on the chief, returning my skull, This story tells me the Indian legend is really absurd, anything can happen.
Transcribing lyrics to prove true love.
The End.