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Happy New Year.

When New Year's Day arrived, people started posting their year-end summaries on social media, but I always feel that the year doesn't truly end until the Spring Festival.

Therefore, I have also chosen to write my year-end summary on New Year's Eve.

It is actually quite difficult to write the first sentence of a year-end summary.

This year, I continued to meet new people, visit new places, and try new things. The happiness and unhappiness were roughly a 30/70 split; it wasn't exactly "happy," but it was certainly brilliant.

So, if this year were a movie, it would be hard to choose the first shot. Thus, the lousy editor put that opening sentence on the screen.

In a novel I read this year, there was a setting about a creature in the universe composed of thoughts, whose growth process is the process of thinking becoming more intense. Therefore, in the eyes of humans, they are a race that is mentally active but perpetually immature and easily changed. They never grow up, and they never have stable values or codes of conduct. Because the moment they possess a fixed thought is the moment they die.

People don't write summaries when they get old. Because this year is never much different from last year. Only young people, who still have the vitality to reach out to new circles and the interest to accept new things, feel good about themselves being different today compared to yesterday. They are impatient to show their differences to others at a certain point in time.

Although the wording makes the paragraph sound a bit derogatory, I also consider myself a young person, so I call this change, unique to young people, growth.

Through a bunch of miscellaneous things, I barely managed to introduce the title, so let's return to the general process of a year-end summary.

I read many books and understood many truths, yet I still couldn't live this life well.

I think this statement is wrong. No matter what problems you encounter in life, there will always be someone who has had the same troubles as you. The billions of people in the world make small-probability events a common occurrence. Baidu and Google can solve almost 80% of our confusion. We are not special; in fact, we are very ordinary. We worry about the worries of most people and are confused by the confusion of most people.

This kind of helplessness that most people encounter will definitely be recorded by someone. As long as you keep reading, you will eventually encounter a book that hits the nail on the head and dissects you thoroughly.

I am an ordinary person among the countless people in this world, living an ordinary life among countless kinds of lives, troubled by some of the countless ordinary worries.

But taking the step to accept the fact that I am an ordinary person is actually not easy. After all, it's not easy to forget that child who stood on the lawn in middle school and declared to the wind that he would save the world.

The sensitivity of adolescence made me view the differences I perceived from others as my own special traits. Now I realize that people are just ordinarily different from one another. Others easily accept the differences between themselves and others, while I have been trapped in non-conformity by the "specialness" I labeled myself with.

There are all kinds of people in the world,

and you will definitely meet all kinds of people. 　　

Trying to define a person with a single word is a very naive act. Good person, bad person, kind, scumbag, toxic woman...

Actually, there are only two types of people in the world: charming people and boring people.

It is possible to interact with only one side of a person, but one must not forget that they, like oneself, have multiple masks. In terms of the complexity of personality, humans also manifest as ordinary and common.

Learned some programming, edited a few videos, read Dream of the Red Chamber and Zizhi Tongjian, breakups, the pandemic, online classes, Onmyoji...

One ordinary thing after another pieced together my Gengzi year.

These things, which perhaps someone is doing at every moment, happened to constitute me this year. Each individual is a unique glimmer of light in a world called ordinary. They constantly seek intersections in their ordinariness to make their own scripts unique.

Accept your own ordinariness, and find the unique self within the ordinary.

This is the biggest change this year.

I hope to watch fireworks in Japan next year, I hope the pandemic will end soon, and I hope to meet a better version of myself.